Green Is the New Black

Whoever thought up this hippie pussy liberal bullshit trend deserves to be shot. Or perhaps hung with a rope made of nothing but recycled fibers.

Don't get me wrong. I'm all for recycling, conserving natural resources, finding new sources for fuel, etc., etc. What I am not for is the self righteous blathering of everyone "Going Green". I hate the t-shirts and bags that I see around my campus that blatantly scream "I recycle! And if you don't, you need to go to hell and die!" This Mother Earth/Nourish Your Mother/I-wear-nothing-but-hemp-and-vegan-fibers-because-I-care-that-much shit is really tiresome. An episode of South Park comes to mind - Hybrid cars, anyone?

Its a fad. Just like everything else. Its "awesomely cool" to recycle now. But soon, the Hollywood chicas and dudes will tire of being "environmentally conscious", and the entire United States will realize those "Green is my favorite color" shirts are no longer in style. Then we'll be back to vomiting more and more trash upon the planet, starting with the shirts. Which would be a sadder state of affairs. Sadder because pollution would pick up, not that the shirts were gone. The only consolation to me would be that maybe the really into it people will start bathing again, so I no longer have to endure their venomous odors.

Yes. Recycle. Yes. Conserve paper and energy. Yes. Try not to harm the environment. But, no. Do not tell me about it and how fucking proud you are of yourself. I don't really give a damn.